My Life (nobody else would want it!) |
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Idle thoughts in the life of an IT Professional that's married with children. My Profile Map of Countries I've Visited Other blogs that I write: The Wine Spot WhineSpot (co-hosted) Other Blogs that I read: My Life (by Karen) Carrie's Blog A Nichol's Worth (Patti) Points to Ponder My Life in Paradise (Curt's Blog) poopee shmoopee's blog BostonBlueEyes (Colin's blog) LQ's Blog, Moo Alex Simon of Space Mark's Regular Life Trucker Bob's Blog  Shared pain is lessened Shared joy is multiplied
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Thursday, April 13, 2006
Post 715 Thank God it's Friday.... er... I mean, the last workday of the week! Yep, real short week for me, as today's my Friday! WHOO HOO! On the left side, a bi tdown, you'll see I've added a new feature to my blog. It tells what country my readers are from. Who are all these people? *laughing* Yesterday, I had people from 12 countries visit! WOW! For today only, if you do read this blog, please leave me a comment! I'd love to see who's visiting. Thank you. Tomorrow, I take my daughter to the airport where she leaves for 7 days to visit a friend in Colorado. She'll miss her first ever Easter dinner with us *frown*. The rest of the family will all be at my house Sunday for dinner. I'm beginning to appreciate these get-togethers more and more as I get older. Other than that, not much more to report, but I do have some funnies for you all: Rednecks on Illegal Aliens A Mexican drinks his beer and suddenly throws his glass in the air, pulls out his pistol and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In Mexico our glasses so cheap we don't need to drink from the same glass twice." An Iraqi, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his AK-47 and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In Iraq we have so much sand to make glasses that we don't need to drink out of the same glass twice either." The REDNECK, cool as a cucumber, picks up his beer, drinks it, throws his glass into the air, pulls out his gun, shoots the Mexican and the Iraqi then catches his glass as it falls into his hand. He says, "In America we have so many illegal aliens that we don't have to drink with the same ones twice." And just for Carrie: QUESTIONS ABOUT 2010 OLYMPICS Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics these are some questions people the world over are asking!!!! Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website (frightening, isn't it!) Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK) A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die. Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA) A: Depends on how much you've been drinking. Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden) A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water. Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden) A: So it's true what they say about Swedes. Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy) A: Let's not touch this one. Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK) A: What did your last slave die of? Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA) A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked. Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions. Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK) A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do. Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA) A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked. Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany) A: No, WE don't stink. Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in Canada? (USA) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather. Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy) A: Yes, gay nightclubs. Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA) A: Only at Thanksgiving. Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany) A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal. Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA) A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking. Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA) A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first. On to the news: This is an absolutely hilarious commercial someone sent me: A really great tire commercial! Hey Karen, the next time a guy pisses you off... buy one of these! *LOL* Couple fakes having six children without the aid of fertility treatments to get free things Man who provided sperm for in-vitro fertilization so woman could have child now being sued for child support Space probe photographs smiley face on Mars as those Martians try to lull us into a false sense of security Cletus and Britney's young-un' dun falled off his high-chare And in news from my own state: You can no longer legally ejaculate on somebody's face without their consent in Connecticut And this is a MUST read! Old VERY POPULAR celebrity attends own Walk of Fame ceremony in nothing but a red T-Shirt (with pic) That's it for today... no blog tomorrow as I'll be off work! Have a great weekend and wonderful Easter Holiday! |