Idle thoughts in the life of an IT Professional that's married with children.

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Map of Countries I've Visited


Other blogs that I write:

The Wine Spot

WhineSpot (co-hosted)


Other Blogs that I read:

My Life (by Karen)

Carrie's Blog

A Nichol's Worth (Patti)

Points to Ponder

My Life in Paradise
(Curt's Blog)

poopee shmoopee's blog

BostonBlueEyes (Colin's blog)

LQ's Blog, Moo Alex

Simon of Space

Mark's Regular Life

Trucker Bob's Blog



My Current Weather




My favorite saying:

Shared pain is lessened Shared joy is multiplied

 
Post 575
Another rainy day.. but better than being in New Orleans!

I sure hope things dry out quickly for the people devvestated by the hurricane. Watching it on TV and online, it's so hard to imagine.
At least it's good weather for sleeping, but we still have to keep the A/C on, as it's extremely humid and warm still.

I can't believe how much looting is going on down there.. a police officer was found stealing a 42" plasma TV out of a CHILDRENS HOSPITAL! Good grief.

Thank goodness, this is supposed to be a gorgeous weekend, weather-wise.

My dad's doctors appt was posponed till today.. so no news there.

Oh, and there's a link to Trucker Bob's new blog on the left!

Other than that, not much new... so on to the news:

(an interesting read)
College sex columnist appalled to discover that there are men out there who have never had oral sex with a woman. "Sex with him was like trying to assemble an Ikea bookcase using instructions written upside-down in Aramaic"

Frazzled by nonstop Katrina coverage, CNN weatherman suffers hissy fit when anchor keeps interrupting (Video here)

Proving that he should be assassinated immediately, Hugo Chavez offers fuel and food to hurricane victims (a very interesting read)

And my headline of the day:
Ron Popeil sells Ronco for $55m. That's just two easy payments of $40m and $15m. But wait, there's more. You get this fabulous set of ginsu knives absolutely FREE.

And now, for something to make you smile.

Curt and Bubba, pay attention here now!

Redneck Hints & Tips

General
Never take a beer to a job interview. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets. Even if you're certain that you are
included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home.

Dining Out
When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup, and pour slowly so as not to "bruise" the fruit of the wine. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.

Entertaining In Your Home
A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist. Do not allow the dog to eat at the table... no matter how good his manners are.

Personal Hygiene
While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys. Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman's jewelry and alter the taste of finger foods.

Dating (Outside The Family)
Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date. Be aggressive. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago." Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; Others might say "Monday."
If the latter is the answer, it is the man's responsibility to get her to school on time.

Theater Etiquette
Crying babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately after the movie has ended. Refrain from talking to characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you.

Weddings
Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot. For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance. Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for this special occasion.


Driving Etiquette
Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles; Even if the gun is loaded, and the deer is in sight. When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer. Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.

Have a great day all!

posted by Dave at Wednesday, August 31, 2005