Idle thoughts in the life of an IT Professional that's married with children.

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Post 661
Another payday... ka-ching...

Yep, payday today, and I'll be at the main office working.

Has anyone been watching the new season of American Idol? Good grief, where DO these idiots come from! I guess everyone wants their 30 seconds of fame.. *chuckle*

No Karen, I'm NOT getting hot flashes, that's the REAL weather here! *LOL*

And michelle... hmm, I wonder who would volunteer for that high-speed photograph! *LOL*

Hey Bob, have you been over to the wine blog yet? *chuckle* Have you ever gotten any of those wines yet?

Sheesh, I have to wait 4 more weeks till another short week! The good news is, I get two short weeks in a row then! *chuckling*

Well, lots to do and little time to do it this morning... so here's something interesting, then the news:

Gotta love English!

If you've learned to speak fluent English, you must be a genius! This little treat is on the lovely language we share and is only for the brave. Peruse at your leisure, English lovers.

Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:

1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
2. The farm was used to produce produce.
3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum
9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10. I did not object to the object.
11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13. They were too close to the door to close it.
14. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail
18. After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests
21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

Quicksand works slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd, or an end?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are
out, they are invisible.

On to the news:

Alaskan Volcano Cam! (very cool, remember they're 4 hours behind EST)

And for those science geeks out there:
Aussies claim ion space engine breakthrough. "Warm up the Phasers Scotty"

A recipe for Guinness ice cream? BRILLIANT!

For $11,000 you can own a 400 Joule 1.8 Gigawatt EMP shockwave generator

16-year-old Illinois student expelled from high school for doodling gang sign "D.L.K." in his notebook. The student's name is Derek Leon Kelly

And for my "Headline of the Day":
Laurence Fishburne sued by ex-assistant because she was pregnant and single. Too bad she didn't take the blue pill

Well, that's it for today... enjoy your Thursday all!

posted by Dave at Thursday, January 19, 2006