My Life (nobody else would want it!) |
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Idle thoughts in the life of an IT Professional that's married with children. My Profile Map of Countries I've Visited Other blogs that I write: The Wine Spot WhineSpot (co-hosted) Other Blogs that I read: My Life (by Karen) Carrie's Blog A Nichol's Worth (Patti) Points to Ponder My Life in Paradise (Curt's Blog) poopee shmoopee's blog BostonBlueEyes (Colin's blog) LQ's Blog, Moo Alex Simon of Space Mark's Regular Life Trucker Bob's Blog  Shared pain is lessened Shared joy is multiplied
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Friday, March 31, 2006
Post 708 Finally... it's Friday! Well it's been an up and down week, but it's finally almost over. Last night, I went to see a friend (John) that I haven't seen in 5 years. When I left my last job, we lost touch even though we were great friends, as he had gotten an unlisted phone # because of problems at home and I just had never gotten it from him. He finally got in touch with me a few weeks ago, and we decided to hook up last night. He goes every few Thursdays to the Elks club in a town next to mine, to play some Texas Hold-Em. It's $10 to get in, and the winner based on how many people show up, gets upwards of $1000. Last night, there were about 150 people there, and the action was fast and furious. I lasted about an hour and a half before losing it all. It was fun, but not as fun as playing cards with a bunch of friends (we were at different tables). When we did get a chance to speak, it seems he's had an incredibly rough time since I last saw him, with some personal and family problems, but that's all turning around, and I've never seen him happier. Through all the discussions of his ups and downs, he has an inner strength like nobody I know. He had gotten through some major crises in his life, and wasn't afraid to talk about them, nor tell me how great things are turning out now. Listening to some of the things he's gone through, it kinda struck me.. and on the drive home, even more so. Sometimes I don't realize just how incredibly lucky I really am. My troubles seemed small and trivial when I thought of my friend. It was kind of a wake up call to me. Some things have happened in my life recently, and now I believe they're for a reason. The times... they are a changing..... On to the news: Your wife has shut you down in the bedroom -- do you: A) Ask her more nicely? B) Surprise her in the shower? Or C) start a blog about it and alert the local media? (With video) Ok, this one even had me confused Vienna launches "driving license for dogs." Your dog gets dizzy chasing his bumper Mother buys DVD player from Wal-Mart, unaware it's pre-loaded with hardcore porn. Says her 13-year-old daughter: "It's very gross. I saw body parts I've never seen before" Tori Spelling has a new show and boobs to go with it And now, My BOTD! There's always Always room for one more! Have a great weekend all...! Thursday, March 30, 2006
Post 707 Life is good once more.... Yep, had a nice drive in my Vette yesterday, taking it home from my mom in law's house. I had to move it for a few days while a new furnace is installed (have to go through garage to get there). There's just something.... kinda like riding a motorcycle, the freedom and comfort of driving a car like that. On the other hand, my sons car STILL isn't done! Seems they're having trouble installing the stereo components that were stolen when the car was first at the body shop. Hopefully... it'll be done this afternoon. Other than that, I'm pressed for time today, so I'll jump right into the news: Ten-year-old winner of a children's poetry competition hands back her prize money after newspaper readers noticed that her poem was remarkably identical to the work of a well-known writer Chances are this NJ cop's buddies will never stop hearing the story about the day he caught the Lamborgini Here you go. Answers to all of life's little questions! You know what you'd get if you were caught doing 101 mph in a 70-mph zone. Care to guess what the Lt. Governor of South Carolina got? You want to go into space on the Virgin Space Shuttle? Tough tittie if you have implants Scientists make water flow uphill. Next week, lead into gold The Top 10 80's Music Videos, with videos! (my fave, #5 Cyndi Lauper, with Captain Lou and a bunch of other wrestlers! LOL) That's it for today... have a great one! Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Post 706 Time to take the Vette out.... Yep, tonight after work I bring the Vette home, if at least for a few days. I can't wait. We went to pick up my son's car last night at the body shop, but it's still not really ready so I gave them another day. Hopefully, tonight on the way home. I picked up my new TV last night, with the help of my friend Dave.. and MAN is it big! *LOL* 42 inches of plasma pumping light! Now, all I have to do is order my digital cable, and High Definition content, and I'll really be in heaven. Even so, I was watching the UCONN Women last night (lost in overtime) on a HUGE screen. Other than that... work has been busy. Yesterday at the main office was highly interesting due to a project I'm working on. The weather's finally getting real nice. Today and tomorrow, it's supposed to get up in the mid 60's, and Friday into the 70's. Well, on to the news: Just for Karen: "Vibrators made the job much easier, though some early ones ran on steam, she says, requiring the doctors to shovel in coal" I've always wanted to go to the Czech Republic.... World's first "beer spa" opens in Czech Republic. Visitors can get beer massages, beer cosmetics and swim in beer while drinking a pint at a bathside bar For those of you who still have a liver left, the world's oldest bottle of whisky is headed for the auction block State senator welcomes new colleague to the senate floor by offering her a drive down a country road to prove if she's a real blonde Sharon Stone, my hero: Sharon Stone thinks kids should give and receive more oral sex (You've got to read this one) The man whose Ferrari was wrecked last month has now had his 2005 Mercedes-Benz SLR McLaren taken from him That's it for now... enjoy your Hump-Day..! Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Post 705 Busy? You want busy??? There's so much going on at home lately... my head is spinning. The good news is, I'll be picking up my new big-screen TV tonight after work! WHOO HOO! I'll be spending the rest of the night figuring out how to use it now. I have to pick up my wife on the way home from work today, then stop to pick up my son's car, which is finally done at the body shop. The insurance goes back on the Vette today, and I have to move it home for a few days as my mother in law is having a new furnace put in at her house, and they need to go through the garage. Next week, the Vette will go in for some service and get it ready for the season. I left the wine dinner menu at work yesterday, so I didn't get a chance to scan it, but I"ll write down at least the food part here:
Tomorrow, I'll try to have a copy of the whole thing so you can see the wines that go with it. On to the news: Holy book of Pastafarianism to hit bookstore shelves Tuesday. Ramen Fourteen-year-old girl abducted for sex, finds hammer under car seat and vigorously introduces man's groin to the word "NO" Muslim man murmurs the word "divorce" three times in his sleep. Naturally, this is a legal divorce More proof she's an idiot: Britney Spears is not a happy girl. Nude photos of her were bought up by an online casino for $40,000. They may have been taken by Justin Timberlake back in the day when she was still hot Three million people entered an online NCAA bracket. Four of them somehow predicted this Final Four Man sues eHarmony.com because they won't let him join. The fact that he's still legally married seems to be the sticking point Woman who had breast enlargement surgery to transform her B-cup to a DD-cup is taking her boss to court for looking at her breasts too often And just for my friend michelle, One of the coolest things you'll see today: butterflies with transparent wings That's it for today... enjoy your day! Monday, March 27, 2006
Post 704 UCONN's last breath.... Well, the weekend started out fantastically, with dinner and a movie with my friend Dave. We went out for Mexican food, then to the movies to see V for Vendetta. I thought the movie was great, as did he, but it's not what you see in the previews. It's promoted to LOOK like an action movie, when in fact it's only action is within the first 20 minutes. The rest of the movie, is a political thriller. I'll not spoil it for anyone, but it was very much worth seeing. Then, it was home by 10pm where my friend Ray came over to watch UCONN win an overtime game that was as thrilling as any I've ever seen. Saturday, I ran some errands, then went to a wine tasting in the afternoon, followed by more shopping for something to eventually put a new TV on. We stopped at the store that has the TV I want, and they told me of a special deal I can get on one, and of course, with money off my wife's eyes bugged out. So, hopefully, by the end of this week, we may have our new TV I've been dying for. This is the one I want... Sunday, I went to see mom as I always do with my daughter, went over to my mother in laws and started the Vette, then home to get ready for our wine club's wine dinner. The dinner, was again, an incredible hit with menu items like a Pistachio Crusted Lamb Chop, Potato Pancake and Natural Reduction for an appetizer, and Beef Wellington AND Coquilles St. Jacques for the main course. There was special wines paired for each course to enhance the enjoyment of each individual flavors presented. Tomorrow, I'll try to have a link to the full menu. Needless to say, I got home last night so full that I still am not hungry this morning. Oh, one other thing. The people that our oil company sent over on Friday to wash the side of our house.... well, it's no better than before they came. Other than that.... time for some news: The top 15 skylines in the world Friends restore soldier's 1967 Plymouth Barracuda while he served in Iraq That's what friends are for! Founder of IKEA is fourth-richest man in the world but drives a 15-year-old Volvo beater and flies economy-class. So you have at least one thing in common with the fourth-richest man in the world Some things get OH so much better with age: Alyssa Milano - Fhm Photoshoot with video That's it for today... enjoy your Monday all! Friday, March 24, 2006
Post 703 Finally, a light at the end of the tunnel... Well, I did have to take a half day off yesterday. I called the oil company, and DEMANDED a different technician be there AT 11:30am, or within 30 minutes of it, AND a manager. I got home at 11:30, and they were both there by 11:35. The manager started giving me crap and being all tough about the side of the house not being his problem, and I looked him in the eye so he knew I meant business, and TOLD him he'd have it cleaned. 10 minutes later, he was out there scrubbing the side of my house himself. I wasn't going to let him get away with anything. Well, the furnace is fixed (they replaced anything at all questionable), and the side is almost done, they're coming back today with a pressure washer. Oh, while they were there, I ran down to Home Depot to get a new mailbox and post. When I got back, there's the guy, scrubbing soot off the side of my house. I walk up to him and say (holding my rage in check... barely) "By the way, do you realize the brush you took from my garage that you're now using is what I use to wash my CORVETTE????" (it isn't, but I was getting a kick out of seeing him squirm now). He cleaned it so clean he could have brushed his teeth with it all the while apologizing (I bet michelle's chuckling at this point). So, I put up the new mailbox and post, and life was once again.... pretty good. Yeah, there's a few other things going on that I haven't written about here too.... but they're straightening themselves out too. This weekend, just more basketball! Tonight, my friend Ray's coming over at almost 10pm to watch UCONN! We're really FANS! Oh, speaking of basketball.. DUKE LOST! YAYYYYYYYYY! On to the news: The poor old Millers died and look what was found on their farm! Some of this stuff reinforces the old axiom that the truth is often far stranger than fiction. You just have to see some of this collection to believe it. Makes you wonder what else is waiting out there undiscovered. Here's to you, Mr. "Anybody Who Tries to Rob My Store Is Fixin' to Get a Six-Pack Upside the Head" Guy Nurse called Jesus asked to change name to avoid scaring patients told that "Jesus will be with you soon" As if I needed another reason NOT to want VOIP phone service: Vonage puts 911 caller on hold while house burns down. Woo-hoo, woo-hoo-hoo Good thing this wasn't your bank Carrie! Canadian banker fired for bringing prostitute to his office and leaving her there after hours, says he felt unappreciated in his wrongful dismissal suit And now... for My BOTD! You know there's always room for one more! Have a great weekend all...! Thursday, March 23, 2006
Post 702 When it rains, it pours... Well, on March 8th, we had our (oil fired) furnace cleaned. On Tuesday, we had all that soot on the side of the house. Yesterday, the furnace shut down in safety mode, twice. We woke up this morning to a very, very cold house. So... I called the oil company again (we have a service contract through them) and told them in no uncertain terms, NOT to send the same technician today. They're going to call me back, but I'll probably have to take a half day off. Then, I get to work.... and my wife calls. Seems our mailbox post is broken in half, and lying on the ground. *sigh* I'll leave you with that to think about, and move on to the news: Man arrested for selling marijuana to raise bail money for sons arrested for selling marijuana. The cycle of life continues Seventeen Indians die from "country liquor," drank while toasting at funeral of friend who died from drinking "country liquor" Woman with 20 tons of garbage inside her house says she thinks she may have a hoarding issue (with pic -- judge for yourself) Man charged $673 for a 500-foot ambulance ride That's it for today... enjoy your day (I doubt I will...) Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Post 701 Another day in Paradise.... Sorry for not posting yesterday, but I was feeling horrible yesterday morning, so I decided to stay home. I didn't even get on the computer at all. Today, I feel a bit better so here I am in work. Yes, my brother's surgery went well thank goodness. It did take a bit longer than expected though. Just spoke to him, and he's sore as heck, but doing well. Anyways, I'm at home yesterday and my neighbor comes over and asks what happened to my furnace recently. Not knowing what he's talking about, I follow him to the side of my house where the whole side (white house) is black from soot, and the furnace exhause is clogged with soot. We just had a cleaning 9 days ago so I'm really upset and I call the furnace people and the guy shows up at almost 9pm last night. He cleaned everything out again, thinking it was something that got sucked into the intake. I told him, someone from there had better clean the side of my house, as it's never had one tiny bit of soot on it till now. I'll wait to hear from them. Moving right along... here's the news: If you want to be smarter at work you need to slack off more. And the fact you're reading this here suggests you're not unfamiliar with the concept Remember all that "lost productivity" from the NCAA tournament? Turns out to be BS. Duh Woman sues Taco Bell for burns suffered when she spilled some breadstick sauce on her jeans. Four years ago Now Canada has a problem with Australia's "bloody hell" ads DOT decides how to transport 400 gallons of "caustic chemical soup" across New Jersey. "A tiny amount the size of a pin could kill a person" Microsoft delays launch of Vista operating system. In equally shocking news, Courtney Love may be out of running for Mother of the Year award And especially for my dear friend michelle: One of the coolest pics you'll see this lifetime That's it for today... enjoy your day all! Monday, March 20, 2006
Post 700 Late, but still here... Blogger was having a problem this morning, so I wasn't able to get to it to publish my blog this morning when I normally do. Well, this weekend was full of great basketball, and Friday, I had a great time with my brother and my friend Ray, having wings, beers and watching basketball! Friday night we had a great dinner with our friends, and UCONN won a VERY scary game! Saturday, I ran a whole bunch of errands, and went home later and watched more basketball. Sunday, we had the family over for corned beef and cabbage, which we do every year, and then we watched the 2nd round UCONN game in the afternoon that they won over Kentucky. Last night.... wasn't feeling too well so I just vegged out all night. This morning, I don't feel all that well, but I'm in work anyways. If I start feeling cruddy, I'll just go home. On a side note, good wishes would be appreciated for my brother who's going in for an operation today. On to the news: Missouri man carried 1300 feet by a tornado after being sucked out of his trailer...and lives to tell about it List of the 10 hottest cars in America. Suprisingly, two are actually made in that country The JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser. Finally a tank that is both terror-inducing and affordable. Also available on Amazon Wallpaper that updates with an photorealistic image of the Earth as it would be seen from space at that precise moment Top 10 places to party while on Spring Break Coolest photo you will see today: Aircraft carrier sunset That's it for today... enjoy your day. Friday, March 17, 2006
 Post 699 What a day! Happy St. Patricks Day all!!! To show I have the gift of Blarney, Here's a picture of yours truly, kissing the Blarney Stone, at Blarney Castle in Ireland, back in 2000! Yesterday, the NCAA Tournament started with a bang. #2 Seeded Tennessee should have lost and almost did to Winthrop. They barely squeaked by on a basket with time running out to win by 2. #5 Syracuse, who stormed through the Big East tournament, lost what should have been an easy one to Texas A&M. #4 Boston College needed double overtime to beat a lowly Pacific College team. See up to the minute brackets here Well, magic things happen in March... we'll see what else happens today and this weekend! I'm working only a half day today, then going to a great sports bar for some beer, wings and basketball! A few friends are meeting me there so it should be great fun. If you're going to drink today... remember the famous words of Sheriff Bart from Blazing Saddles "Man drink like that, without eating, he is going to die…", so eat something while drinking! Tonight, our friends Ray and Debbie are coming over for dinner, and then to watch UCONN play at 7:15. Should be a great time. And now, the news: The St. Patricks Day Training Manual! The reason Ozzy didn't play at the Rock n Roll Piss Stain induction ceremony? "My balls hurt" (seriously.. read the story!) Hot pepper kills prostate cancer cells in study... but is the world really ready for habañero suppositories? Eighty years ago this morning, Robert Goddard lit a fuse and changed the world Feds try to carry materials needed to make a homemade bomb through airport security 21 times and succeed in getting through 21 times. Now please take off your shoes, belt and hand in your tweezers before boarding the aircraft grandma Don't you feel safe now? And now, My BOTD! (and she's wearing Green!) and there's always room for one more! Have a great weekend all! Thursday, March 16, 2006
Post 698 The Dance Begins.... The Big Dance (NCAA Tournament) officially begins today (not counting the 65-64 game). Tomorrow noon, I'll be sitting in a great sports bar, having a beer, eating some wings, and watching some basketball. Life is good! *LOL* Baseball already starts in 2 weeks too. I haven't been interested in it since I was a kid... and probably won't be ever again. It just doesn't excite me any longer. It's actually so cold out this morning, there's a few snow flurries around. Lets hope it's nature's last gasp... before giving up to the Spring. Other than that... not much new today. I'm hoping today goes smoothly in work... I just need a weekend bad this week for some reason. On to the news: The 50 best actors, according to the actors themselves Of all the things you could wear on your head during convenience store robbery, milk crates probably shouldn't be near top of list (with picture goodness) University of Alaska, Fairbanks wins seventh D-1 Rifle national championship in eight years, defeating lesser known schools such as Army, Navy Copenhagen's Little Mermaid statue vandalized with green paint, dildo. Police still trying to peg culprits (pic) How'd you do on THIS test? Find out if you could have passed the 8th grade back in 1895 Top 10 vehicles owned by billionaires That's it for today... have a great one! Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Post 697 Another sign of Spring... Had to wear my sunglasses on the way into work.... yep, Spring is coming! Last Saturday was just SO nice out (mid 60's), that my daughter and I just had to take the Vette out for a short ride.. LOL Yesterday, I spent a lot of the day off-site working with the finest ladies I've ever had the honor to know. They're a bunch of (kinda) older ladies that work on the Ryan White Project (pediatric AIDS), and also with pediatric cancer patients. Talk about living angels.... I could never do what they do. And they SO light up when I come to see them! Does my heart good... to see their smiles at just seeing me show up. Today I'll be up to my armpits again, but in a good way. About 11 or so people are moving into one of the locations I am responsible for. Here's a good funny for you today: International Rules of Manhood 1. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella 2. It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances: a. When a heroic dog dies to save its master. b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse. c. After wrecking your boss' car. d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game". e. When she is using her teeth. 3. Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies. 4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours. 5. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you actually marry her. 6. Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However, complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable. 7. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. 8. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest. 9. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing. 10. You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend. 11. It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless supermodel... And it's free. 12. Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts. 13. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked. 14. Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed. 15. If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything. 16. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers. 17. A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight. 18. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy. 19. If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer. 20. Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response. 21. Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights: a. Yeah, Baby, Push it! b. C'mon, give me one more! Harder! c. Another set and we can hit the showers! 22. Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e. Both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need. 23. Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep astopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary. 24. The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs. 25. It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours. 26. Thou shall not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue. 27. The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story. 28. There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever. And now, the news: Ok, this is the must-see video of the week. GW meeting and greeting autistic kid that scored 20 points in a HS basketball game. Here you go Carrie, a new, highly addictive game! LOL And for all you Star Wars fans out there: Rick McCallum promises the new Star Wars television show will be everything the fans wanted the prequels to be, but will be using completely new characters Be on the lookout for three women with two pairs of leather and metal bondage suspension cuffs, a 28-inch-long leather whip, bath salts, rainbow pot holders and an electrical stimulation device michelle, have you been a bad girl? LOL Oh man.... now THIS is the kinda brackets I want to fill out! Got your NCAA bracket filled in? How about your TnA bracket? TODAY ONLY! Starbucks will serve free coffee on Wednesday, March 15th, from 10:00 a.m. to 12:00 p.m. That's it for today... enjoy your Hump-Day..! Tuesday, March 14, 2006
Post 696 Busy, busy, busy.... Today's going to be a very busy day, so only a short post. The UCONN Women's NCAA Tournament brackets came out last night, and luckily they're playing close to home. If they make it through the second round, they'll play about 35 miles away! Both the mens and womens teams have a long way to go though, to win another national championship! Not much else to report right now and squeezed for time, so here's the news: from my bud Curt... Woman gets beer from her kitchen fawcet. Ok, how do I live THERE???? Police surprised to clock motorcyclist in the act of setting the Louisiana Land Speed Record Isaac "Chef" Hayes quits "South Park," says he finally can't take religious jibes -- after lining his pockets thoroughly Dumb: Your three-year-old son finds a loaded 9mm in your couch. Dumber: You take the gun away and PUT IT BACK IN THE COUCH. STUPID: Three-year-old finds the gun again and shoots you in the knee Oh I'll catch hell for this one...: Heads up: Today, March 14th, is "Steak & BJ Day." That's it for today... have a good one! Monday, March 13, 2006
Post 695 And the Madness Begins! Well, the NCAA Tournament Selections happened last night, and UCONN is a #1 seed in the Washington area, meaning their first 2 games are in Philadelphia. Their first round game is against the America East Champions, Albany College. Honestly, they shouldn't even come close to beating UCONN. This is their first time in the NCAA Tournament, and they have 10 losses this year. Here's a look at the Mens Brackets. The women's brackets will be announced tonight. It was a quiet weekend... nothing much happened. I watched some basketball.. worked on my friend's website... not much else. It was so beautiful on Saturday (in hte 60's), that my daughter and I went and took a short ride in the Vette. *S* Other than that, not much else new. Here's a good Monday Morning Funny for you (especially Curt and Bubba): FAKE OKIES Bubba Wayne and Billy Bob, who are both from Denton,Texas, traveled to Grand Lake, Oklahoma for a vacation. While walking along a busy downtown street, they see a sign in a store window which reads, "Suits $5.00 each, Shirts $2.00 each and trousers $2.50 a pair." Bubba Wayne says,"Woo Hoo, Billy Bob! We could buy a whole gob of these clothes, take 'em back to Denton, sell 'em to all our friends and make a fortune fer us." Bubba Wayne continues, "Now when we go in there, don't you say a word, okay? Just let me do the talkin' 'cause if they hear your Texas accent, they might think we're ignorant, and they won't wanna sell them clothes to us. Now, I'll talk in a slow, fake Oklahoma drawl so's they won't know." They go in and Bubba Wayne says with his best fake Oklahoma drawl, "I'll take 50 of them thar suits at $5.00 each, 100 of them thar shirts at $2.00 each, and 50 pairs of them thar trousers at $2.50 each. I'll just back up my pickup and......" The owner of the shop interrupts, "Ya'll from Texas, ain'cha? "Well....yeah," says a surprised Bubba Wayne. "How come'd you know that?" The owner replies, "Cause this here's a dry-cleaners." On to the news: Do you have fish? Want to teach them tricks? Porn star Mary Carey invited to White House dinner with President Bush as somewhere, Bill Clinton loses his mind Investigators claim Bigfoot footprint belongs to a Bigfoot that moved there sometime during the '70s One metre crayfish found in Tasmania. For you American folks that's about 3 feet, or a whole mess 'o gumbo That's it for today, have a great Monday! Friday, March 10, 2006
Post 694 Anything can happen in sports I guess.... Yes, the #1 team in the country, the UCONN Huskies, lost in the first round of the Big East Tournament. They played like they already had it won, and got the game taken away from them by someone that wanted it more. UCONN Beat Syracuse twice already this season, both times by a good margin, but everyone knows it's hard to beat the same team 3 times a season. Either way, they blew their #1 ranking once again (against an unranked team), and now will likely play out west in the NCAA Tournament. This weekend I'll be taking down my sons waterbed, and putting together and up his new futon. Other than that... not much else on the agenda. My brother will love this. Hey Bruce, did you see Dick Cheney's picture on The Drudge Report Website? That's about it for today.. not much else to report... so on to the news: What happens when you leave your snow-covered car in a parking lot and the snow-plow operator arrives? (With pic) Do you need another reason to be careful what you buy on Ebay? Woman, who clearly doesn't read Ebay item descriptions, shocked when $300 empty box delivered This one says it all: Woman caught on camera putting on makeup while driving tries out the "I was having a blonde moment" defence (pic) More amazing 3D sidewalk art designed to mess with your mind, not with your mouth And now, so Mike H won't cry, My BOTD! of course, there's always room for one more...! Have a great weekend all...! Thursday, March 09, 2006
Post 693 Rain, warm temps and basketball... It's going to rain a bit today... and get into the 40's, but tomorrow through Sunday, it's supposed to get up to 60! Whoo hoo! Finally! March Madness has begun! I've told my boss that I'll be taking a half day off later next week to watch the first round games in the NCAA tournament. This is something a few of us do every year. We go to a sports bar, have lunch and get saturated in NCAA basketball. I can't wait. The place we go (Sliders), has some outstanding wings in quite a few different flavors. Mike H, are you in??? Bruce, you want to come? This is truly one of my favorite times of the year. Oh, and Mike.... if you don't keep commenting, no more BOTD's! *LOL* Today, our UCONN Huskies are playing in the Big East Conference Tournament at noon, and the good news is I can listen to the game on my computer in work! Life is good. Hey Paula, what were you doing here that late last night??? Now for a funny: WASHINGTON, D.C. - A white house source stated that Congress is considerin awarding Vice-President Dick Cheney the Medal of Freedom, the national highest civilian commendation, for his act of bravery in shooting an attorney. The source was quoted to say "All American have wanted to shoot a lawyer at one time or another and Cheney actually had the balls to do it". In a related story, the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department, which issues hunting licenses, said that it will start requiring hunters, wishing to bag a lawyer, to have the new "lawyer's stamp" on their hunting license. Currently Texas hunters are required to carry stamps for hunting birds, deer, and bear, at a cost of $7 annually. The new "lawyers stamp" will cost $100, but open season will be all year long. The department further stated that although the "lawyers stamp" comes at hefty price, sales have been brisk and it is believed it will generate annual revenues in excess of $3 billion dollars the first year. Other states are considering similar hunting stamps. That's about it for now... on to the news: The American Medical Association has taken the position that young, nubile, round, warm, cuddly and bouncy women should not go whoring over Spring Break "We're sorry we misgraded your SAT scores and screwed you out of your college of choice. On the bright side, we're going to refund the fee you paid to take the test" Oh those wacky people from India... Scientists have developed a sensing device to indicate when UFOs are present. Old method of waking up with no memory and a sore ass determined to be unreliable (these are the people taking your tech support call?) Certain Rebel Alliance members seem to have fallen on hard times following the destruction of the second Death Star. (Third story down) This is way too weird... Florida Church holding free porn weekend Hey, even I learned this long ago: Never use the corporate charge card to pay your $241,000 tab in a strip club Now I see your master plan Carrie! *LOL* Canada deploys top-secret teams of expats throughout U.S. to debunk myths that Canadians harbour terrorists, drive dogsleds or drink craploads of beer, eh? This is interesting (read the article about the lawsuit) Men's rights group is essentially arguing that Roe vs. Wade, which lets a woman opt out of motherhood, should allow them to opt out of paying child support. Responsibility for your actions surrenders That's it for today... enjoy your Thursday! Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Post 692 Spring is coming.... The sun is in my eyes once again while driving into work.... so spring is coming. By Saturday, the temps are supposed to be up to almost 60 again. Lets hope the snow has made it's last gasp. The UCONN Women's Basketball team won the Big East Championship last night... now, on to the NCAA Tournament! The UCONN Men start their Big East Tournament tomorrow at noon. We bought my son a new bed last night. He has wanted a futon for some time now, and his waterbed is ready to fall apart.. so we finally broke down (the thought of water cascading down the stairs from his room helped us decide). This week, I have to empty his bed, take it down and set up the new one. Other than that, not too much new today. Hey Mike H, how come you only comment when I don't put up a BOTD???? Time for a new Redneck joke: You know you're in a Redneck Church... 1. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... the finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one. 2. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... people ask,when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em. 3. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... when the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering," five guys and two women stand up. 4. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday. 5. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if... a member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of" (Love it!) 6. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... the choir is known as the "OK Chorale". 7. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... in a congregation of 500 members, there are only seven last names in the church directory. 8. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... people think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy. 9. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... the baptismal pool is a #2 galvanized "Wheeling"washtub. 10. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... the choir robes were donated by (and embroidered with the logo from) Billy Bob's Barbecue. 11. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... the collection plates are really hubcaps from a '56 Chevy. 12. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... instead of a bell you are called to service by a duck call. 13. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... the minister and his wife drive matching pickup trucks. 14. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if ... the communion wine is Boone's Farm "Tickled Pink". 15. You Know You're in a Redneck Church if... "Thou shall not covet" applies to huntin' dogs, too. 16. You know You're in a Redneck Church if ... the final words of the benediction are, "Y'all come back now, Ya hear". God Bless and don't fergit ta say yer prayers! On to the news: Scientists have discovered a huge crater in the Saharan desert that probably caused catastrophic devastation in a long-past age. (speaking of rednecks) Lawnmower featuring 900cc-engine does a football field in 10 minutes, or your own lawn in three -- fast enough to get back to serious weekend beer drinking. It's called the Dixie Chopper. Cletis Federline said to be in the doghouse: "I'm sorry, Ms. Spears, but your husband called here a few minutes ago and told us you weren't allowed to have dessert. In fact, we've been told that no one at the table can have dessert -- because you'll eat it." When landing an airplane, it's important to remember that the landing gear is on the bottom See Aaron... we DO have it right! Hundred-year-old woman shares her secret for long life: "Drink beer" Scientists cross plant with jellyfish gene -- it glows when it needs watering Second-grader brings grenade to school for a very special Show and Tell. On the upside, the kids got to see how a bomb squad operates That's it for today... have a great Hump-Day...! Tuesday, March 07, 2006
Post 691 Where do I begin.....? What a weekend. First, on Friday afternoon, at about 1:30, my son calls and tells me he's been in an accident. A pretty good one so it seems. He's ok, though the driver of the other vehicle asked to be taken to the hospital to be checked out. Seems someone pulled out in front of him way too close, and he hit them. So he gets the ticket for following too closely, instead of the other person for pulling out in traffic. We had the car towed to a body shop where I picked my son up. The front of his car is pretty well smashed up, but luckily, nothing into the engine. We went home, and started the "call the insurance company" process. (it's still going on) Saturday, I got a call about 1pm from my friend Dave, asking me if I wanted to go see the Big East Womens' basketball tournament as he had a couple of tickets, so I said yes. We had a great time, and saw a lot of the UCONN women's team in the crowd, watching to see who they were going to play on Sunday. One of them, Mel Thomas, was seated 3 rows in front of us, and when she got up to leave, we got up and talked to her, and even got our pictures taken with her (Dave had his camera with him). Sunday, I went to see mom as usual. It was a usual Sunday. Yesterday, I took the day off because we had scheduled a furnace cleaning (almost a year in advance), and I was waiting for a DVD burner I ordered to come in. I was awakened at about 8:30am by the phone. The owner of the body shop called to say my son's car was broken into over the weekend *groan*. So, we went down and found that what was stolen was my son's guitar, and the big sub-woofer speaker in the trunk (factory installed). Back home, I waited and waited till at 3pm, I called the furnace people who said the guy would be here soon, we were his next call. 4pm, my DVD drive comes in and I install it, and it works great. 6pm, we call back, guy is still at last stop, but will be here soon. 8pm, I call and REAM them for not calling me, and the guy not being here. We had to reschedule to Wednesday, as he was working on a major problem. I'm not mad about that, only that they never called. So..... that's just a touch about how my weekend went. On to the news: Teenage asshats destroy world's finest collection of 60 vintage Jaguar cars by breaking into the warehouse where they were stored and playing demolition derby with them Man is deeply offended by bikini-wearing rubber chicken in pet store's window. "He asks how he is supposed to walk his children by our store and explain to them why there are naked chickens in the window" Ok, this is just way too weird Invest in your breasts: Credit card company offers free boob job with every sign-up Lifestyles of the Just Plain Unfair: List of the most expensive privately-owned islands in the world, with pics Having solved all of the state's other problems, Connecticut lawmakers debate the official state cookie That's it for today... enjoy your day! Friday, March 03, 2006
Post 690 A long weekend again... YAYYYYYYYYY! Yep, I'm taking Monday off.. so there may not be a blog on Monday. We ended up getting about 5 inches of snow yesterday... and I can't wait for it to melt away, but it may take all weekend *frown*. Comments are down... so either I'm boring, or people are busy. Maybe I'll go a week without a BOTD, and see if that scares up any replies. Maybe my jokes aren't funny! *chuckle* Well, for something new: Word of the day: bellwether Definition:(noun) One that serves as a leader or as a leading indicator of future trends. Synonyms:leader Usage: The degree to which the paper is censored is a political bellwether. Article of the Day: The Breakers The Breakers is a 70-room mansion in Newport, Rhode Island, which was built as the summer home of Cornelius Vanderbilt II. Today, it is Rhode Island's most visited attraction and is open year-round for tours. Why did the mansion's builders avoid using any wood in the construction of the Breakers? This Day in History Bulgaria Regains Independence from Ottoman Empire (1878) After the disastrous April Uprising of 1876, the Conference of Constantinople formed to solve the "Bulgarian Question." When the Ottomans rejected Russia's proposal for a Bulgarian state, Russia declared war on the Ottomans and defeated them with help from the Romanian army and a small contingent of Bulgarian exiles. The subsequent Treaty of Berlin created the Principality of Bulgaria. Soon after, the Bulgarians wrote an advanced democratic constitution. Today's Birthday Alexander Graham Bell (1847) Bell was an important scientist and inventor known for patenting the "speaking telephone" in 1876. He founded the Bell Telephone Company, which came to serve as a model for the emerging telecommunications industry. In addition, he was responsible for important advances in aviation and hydrofoil technology. And now, for the news: A great example of what NOT to put in your resume The worlds only Brokeback Mountain Pez Dispensers! (this is hilarious) Oh this is so weird... you have to read it: In case there is any confusion, a four-year old boy touching your breasts is not seducing you Good news for us Aaron! New research shows your beer gut may just help protect you during a car accident Now this is interesting: News: NBA star's wife lets him celebrate once a year. Did I mention, I meant in bed with another woman "Big breasts and hard nipples won't make you happy" WHAT! Oh, you meant won't make the WOMEN happy.. ok. And one Aaron and I had fun laughing at yesterday: Sushi Etiquette! That's it for today.... enjoy your weekend! Thursday, March 02, 2006
Post 689 That Wacky New England Weather…. Walking out the door today, I was greeted by a brightening East horizon, clear sky with not a cloud in sight. Listening to the radio in the car, I hear that half the state has already announced school closings of half a day. Look down at the ground: Dry. Look up at the sky: Blue. Hmmmm… well, nobody says we’re not prepared.. but to announce half day closures before the first flake has fallen…. wow. Yeah, we are supposed to get 4-8 inches of snow today, beginning around noon. (in fairness, since I’ve been in work, it’s clouded up and the sunshine has gone into hiding) Well, the UCONN Men won last night, and Duke lost.. so next week, barring a major fall against Louisville on Saturday, UCONN should be once again ranked #1 in the country. Other than that… not much else is going on. Looks like I have a friend that wants me to build his business a website, so that’s going to be a lot of fun, and profitable too! Here's a funny for you today: I don't understand. After the last child was born, she told me we had to cut back on expenses - I had to give up drinking beer. I was not a big drinker, maybe a 12-pack on weekends. Anyway, I gave it up but I noticed the other day when she came home from grocery shopping. The receipt included $45 in makeup. I said, "Wait a minute I've given up beer and you haven't given up anything!" She said, "I buy that makeup for you, so I can look pretty for you." I told her, "Hell, that's what the beer was for!" I don't think she'll be back Now, on to the news: Karen, is this from a newspaper in your area? LOL Brothel spokesman thanks American sailors for being so polite when shagging every living thing that moves while on leave Homeowner: 1, Ninja: 0 Students at "alternative" high school build soybean-oil-powered sports car that goes 0-60 in four seconds (check out the pic) Anyone else surprised it took this long to see Lindsay Lohans boobs again? Safe for work Wow.... Hermione loves her some Corona. just like any other high school kid Pentagon to use "stealth sharks" to patrol seas, no word yet if they're fittetd with frickin laser beams And that's it for today... enjoy your Thursday!!! Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Post 688 Hump-Day... and still cold! Well this week's going by kinda slowly.. I think the cold is having something to do with it's speed. Next week will be another short week as I'm taking Monday off. Well, there's a UCONN Mens game tonight, and I also have a pizza party to go to. So.. I'll go to the pizza party for a bit then come home to catch most of the game. Good grief... I hear the new James Bond they picked.... can't drive a stick shift! They ahd to modify his Aston Martin DB5 to make it an automatic, with the stick being a mere prop! GOOD GOD! Is anything sacred anymore???? One of my friends in work (Rich) took me to a new place for lunch yesterday. It's called Five Guys, and it's a hamburger place. Ok, so you say, what's so special about a hamburger place? I could tell this place was different when I walked in the door. There were awards lining the walls from some of the finest ratings systems, including Zagat! The menu is simple, Burgers, Hotdogs or Grilled cheese. Toppings are free and varied, fries are made on site and can be normal or Cajun. Be warned. The burgers are normally double burgers. You have to get the "Little" burger to get a single. I had my bacon burger with onions, tomatoes, pickles, mayo and sauteed mushrooms, as well as an order of Cajun fries. When I took my first bite of this burger, my eyes about popped out of my head. I've never, ever had such a fantastic burger in my whole life, nor am I likely to unless I go back (which I know I will). Both the burger and fries were way above expectations, and the prices are very reasonable. Now I'm hungry just thinking about it.... *LOL* On to the news: Woman pays $2,400 for wedding dress on Ebay, gets nothing in return except email saying, "I just scammed you, sorry for that, it's nothing personal.... It's what I do, and it pays well" Only in Connecticut: Conneticut to implement elephant licensing. Revenues expected to surpass marmoset licensing Best of Jimmy Kimmel's "Unnecessary Censorship" That's it for today.... enjoy your Hump-Day! |